The Principle of a Philosopher by Eternal Fool “Asley”

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“Sooo… Midors! You and Ideà seem to be hitting it off lately! What’s going on there, eh?”

“Gah– Bruce, you stink! Come on, you’ve had too much to drink…”

“What? So you wouldn’t tell me if I’m drunk, is that it? Fine! Asley! Invoke Recover!”

“Rise, Recover…”

“Woo-hoo! Eyes wide open! Now, Midors, spill the beans, eh?”

“I swear, you have WAY too much energy…”

With the alcohol being detoxified from his system, Bruce flashed a fresh smile. However, due to their long-standing camaraderie, Midors saw through his act.

“C’mon, man, it’s not like you got anything to lose.”

“Ooh! Sooo… things are going good for you, eh?”

“W-well… I guess?”

Midors awkwardly chuckled, looking slightly pleased.

“Ooh! I knew it! That’s why Ideà was saying something like she’s ‘got the future secured’! Hahaha!”

Bruce, delightedly discussing his junior’s progress and development, slapped Midors on the back. Despite his embarrassment, Midors accepted Bruce’s encouragement with a hint of joy.

Just then, the door to the reserved restaurant swung open, revealing the Great Mage of Flame and the Ancient Holy Emperor.

“Leon! Sir Gaston!” Asley greeted the two.

Leon nodded in response, and Gaston addressed the group.

“Sorry we’re late, young man.”

“No worries, sir. You were probably having an important discussion with Lady Kaoru and the others, right?”

“Hmm, right.”

After attending Ryan and Reyna’s wedding, Gaston and Leon had headed to meet with Kaoru and other important figures. Only after that meeting was done were they able to come and join this drinking party.

“Oh, sorry, sir — looks like the only remaining seats available are at the counter,” Asley said after spending a moment scanning the room.

Also seated at the counter were Bright and Barun.

“It’s all right. Bright, Barun, and Leon… All of them are pretty decent conversation partners.”

With Gaston saying that, Asley nodded with a smile.

“By the way, what was the meeting about, sir?”

Leon was the one who proceeded to answer Asley’s question,

“Laws, order, and culture — such and such — of the Holy Nation.”

“Ah, so that’s why you had to be there.”

“T’oued still has some information in the archives, but much has eroded with time. It’s always faster to hear it directly from me.”

“And the information I have is outdated, you see,” Bright said, approaching the group from behind Asley. “This way, your highness.”

“Thank you.”

Guided by Bright, Leon proceeded further inside.

As Gaston tried to follow behind them, Asley noticed the absence of a certain someone.

“Hmm? Where’s Konoha, by the way?”

“I think he mentioned something about gatherings of the Magic and Warrior Guardians…”

“Oh, I see… That sounds interesting.”

“That’s why Egd and Hornel aren’t here either. They might come later, though.”

“Unfortunately for them, there’s barely any room left, sir.”

“True. In T’oued, I think they call this… jam-packed like a barrel of sardines. Hah.”

“A barrel of sardines… That certainly is a vivid description.”

“The differences in nations, cultures, and people may seem trivial, but those nuances are what make things interesting.”

“Hahaha, that sounds like something an old man would say, sir.”

“Hah! How about you watch your manners, young man?”

“We’re in a party, sir — no better time than now to ignore all formalities, don’t you think?”

“Well, in that case, don’t just sit there and go get me a drink, you little shit.”

“……Huh?”

◇◆◇◆◇◆◇◆◇◆

The women’s drinking party took place at the Adventurers’ Guild.

Duncan had reserved the building’s dining area solely for the women and opened it up to those invited.

“Wooohoooo! This is so much fun! Rise, Recover! Okay, all set! I’m gonna drink some more!”

Betty had already used the Recover spell five times, reveling in her excitement.

Her teammate, the mage Ideà, was beyond exasperated.

“Just because you’ve learned some magic yourself doesn’t mean you should overdo it. Can’t you rein it in a bit?”

“It’s fine, it’s fine! When it gets so bad that I can’t draw a spell myself, then you can stop me for real!”

Though Ideà admired Betty’s surprisingly self-aware comments, she soon realized it was just wishful thinking.

“Oh for the love of… I have no idea who CAN even stop you…”

“Ehh, don’t worry about it! Look, Pochi’s here, then there’s Lylia and even Miss Irene! Oh, maybe Duncan could do it too? Ahahaha!”

“…I swear, it’s impossible to have a serious conversation with her…”

Ideà muttered her impressions of Betty — impressions that would likely be the same no matter who said it.

Irene watched them from a distance, showing a dry smile.

Seated before Irene were two young girls.

“Here, li’l Irene!”

Natsu placed a slice of cake on the table before Irene’s eyes.

“Be moved to tears, Irene! Behold! These beans were harvested from the Lala Farm!”

The cake was topped with a high mound of beans, creating a strange combination of ingredients.

“……Thanks.”

Irene held a cup of green tea in her hand.

With everything becoming so mismatched, Irene was left with no choice but to remain silent.

[Why am I seated at this table? If it was just the T’oued sweets that Natsu keeps bringing over, it might have been tolerable…!]

Irene cracked an awkward smile as she could bring herself to eat neither the cake nor the beans.

Lina and Lylia, seated at the counter, watched with dry smiles.

“When she said she’d monitor everyone and dispel their alcohol when they’re drunk, I knew it would end up like that… Hahaha.”

“Indeed, having such a strong sense of responsibility can be a double-edged sword.”

“By the way, Miss Lylia-san, are you going too? You know, to that thing they’re doing?”

“Hmm? You mean the founding ceremony of the Devil King’s nation?” Lylia asked, and Lina nodded.

Lylia proceeded to happily say,

“Of course I am. It sounds interesting, doesn’t it?”

“Yes! It does!”

“Well, some people might not be able to go, unfortunately.”

While saying this, Lylia’s gaze returned to Irene.

“Sir Gaston and Miss Irene are necessary for Regalia and the War Demon Nation, after all.”

“Apparently so — I suppose that’s why Irene made that condition to Asley.”

“Hmm?”

Lina tilted her head.

“She demanded that Asley connects her home and that nation with a Teleportation Spell Circle when they get there.”

“Huh!? Not to more important locations like Regalia or Beilanea?”

“Her home is in Beilanea, so she’s got that covered… or so she said.”

“Ahh… ahahaha…”

“Actually, Asley was drunk at the time… so it was actually Warren who made the promise. Really, they’re so cunning…”

“Sounds about right — Sir Asley might forget about it, but you can always count on Warren to see the request through.”

“–Ahh, how nice it is to be in love…” A certain woman said, suddenly taking the seat next to Lina.

“L-Lady Kaoru!?”

Lina stood up abruptly, her surprise evident.

“Come on now, no need to be so formal. And I’m Jun’ko, actually — Kaoru is over there.”

Jun’ko pointed to Kaoru, who was seated beside Lylia.

“I-I’m sorry!”

As Lina bowed deeply, Jun’ko widened her eyes in surprise.

“Pfft– Hahaha! No need to be so uptight. Let’s just enjoy this rare gathering, shall we?”

“Y-Yes.”

As Lina showed relief, Duncan arrived with drinks for the two.

After the four toasted, Lylia inquired,

“Kaoru, Jun’ko, are you both done with your duties?”

“We wouldn’t be here if we weren’t,” Kaoru replied, prompting a faint smile from Lylia.

“Hmm, true enough.”

Soon, as plates of food and snacks filled the counter, Jun’ko spoke up,

“Excuse me.”

The meaning behind her departure was immediately understood by the three.

Kaoru’s eyes gleamed as she watched Jun’ko leave for the restroom.

“Lylia, hand me that.”

“This?”

What Lylia held up… was a bottle of habanero sauce.

“Do you like spicy food?”

Lina asked, to which Kaoru shook her head in response.

“Absolutely not. My sister and I both hate spicy things.”

“Then why– Huh!?”

Before Lina could finish, Kaoru poured a massive amount of habanero sauce into Jun’ko’s drink.

“H-hey…”

Even Lylia, astute as she was, realized this was an extraordinary situation and attempted to stop Kaoru. But Kaoru did not relent.

“Now listen well… Don’t let Jun’ko catch on, all right?”

Kaoru’s intense gaze silenced Lylia, who proceeded to look at her with questioning eyes.

Then, Lylia realized why this was happening.

“Wait, is this… revenge?”

“That’s right. Jun’ko has deceived me for at least ten years. This should be just right.”

It all stemmed from Asley’s plan — one step of which was for Jun’ko to fake an illness.

“She wore makeup to look haggard, and spent her days doing nothing but eating and sleeping! Just thinking about those days of caregiving makes my blood boil…! Whenever I ordered five boxes of my favorite lychees from Regalia, I’d keep only two for myself and give Jun’ko the remaining three… All for her sake! I wanted to ease her suffering, you know! And then I find out it’s all faked!? Well, now she’s going to feel the heat! Literally!”

Kaoru spoke of dangerous things with a refreshing smile, leaving Lylia and Lina speechless.

When Jun’ko returned from the restroom and took a drink from her cup, fire spewed from her mouth, and Kaoru laughed loudly. Meanwhile, at the table where Haruhana, Fuyu, Reyna, and Mana sat, a different conversation was heating up.

“Tonight is your honeymoon, isn’t it, Miss Reyna?”

“Pfft–!?”

Reyna spat out the mead she was sipping.

“Ack…! W-why would you bring that up now, Haruhana!?”

Reyna hurriedly wiped the table, while Fuyu blushed vividly.

The same went for Mana.

“What’s wrong? You’re married — isn’t it only natural?”

“Well, yes, but this isn’t…! I mean, yes, it is, but..!”

“Besides, this is a girls’ night out — There are no gentlemen here, are there?”

“Even so, isn’t it odd to talk about it here? Um… Uh…?”

Reyna was perplexed, but both Mana and Fuyu looked deadly serious.

“Well, how’re you feeling, Reyna?”

“I am quite curious, too, Miss Reyna!”

For a moment, Haruhana tilted her head, and then she realized just how mentally unprepared Reyna was.

“Ah, I see… this night will be your first step into a whole new world, then?”

At that remark, Reyna’s face flushed like fire.

Haruhana let out a short sigh.

“Come to think of it, there is not exactly that much time now — But rest assured! Within a few hours, you will be in Sir Ryan’s arms, and after several more, the sun will be up…”

Facing Haruhana, who preached the truth of the world, Reyna covered her face with both hands.

“If you are too nervous, start by counting the stains on the ceiling of Sir Ryan’s room.”

Haruhana’s matter-of-fact tone as she sipped her tea finally pushed Fuyu over the edge.

“Ahh!? Fuyu’s down!! And she’s bleeding from her nose!?”

With her ears burning red, Fuyu planted her face on the floor as she groaned,

“I’m… not done yet…! I can still listen…!”

Though Fuyu intended to speak those words, they failed to reach anyone’s ears.

Mana helped Fuyu up and back into her seat, and Irene arrived.

“Oh, dear, what would you do without me… Rise, A-rise, Holy Virgin’s Boundary.”

The Craft Circle under Fuyu hastened her healing process.

Mana, relieved, looked up at Irene to express her gratitude — or at least, she tried to.

“Thanks, Miss Ire– Hmm?”

Irene’s face was as red as a tomato, and she did not move a single inch from her spot.

Without any sign of returning to Natsu’s table, she listened intently to Haruhana’s ‘lecture’ with one eye closed.

Mana noticed Irene’s reaction.

[She’s been listening in from the very start, hasn’t she?]

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